Reaching You

Dear Precious Someone that I've longed for and love,

I've been playing a lot of World of Warcraft just to get my mind away from you and yes I did managed to, just a little bit but at least now, I don't feel the pain and sadness that much from our past. Honestly said, I don't know how to react when I get to know that you broke up with him. I'm not sure if I should feel bad for you because you would be sad and dissapointed, or happy because I'll finally get the chance to catch you back. But I was angry to know that you had this relationship with him and nobody knew about it. For how long I don't know. I don't want to assume that you've been with him when we were together and cheated behind my back without me noticing.

We were supposed to meet yesterday and I was so happy to finally get the chance to see you and talk to you but the date was canceled thanks to the pandemic that causes panic around the world. I was so excited the whole night that I couldn't sleep but got beaten down again.

It's good for you to be happy again, at least you're that upset and unhappy thinking about your past, things that makes you unhappy and cried. I wish I could be you ; you have the charm to attract nice people, and I don't. The day I've fallen for you is when I heard your voice on the phone for the first time and the feelings got stronger when I met you for the first time. Magically we got together and it wasn't for long until you met someone new.

Honestly said, how I feel now, I do still have that strong feelings for you. You are that so special for me. Not anyone out there can understand the way I am and the person I am right now. You managed to predict how I feel and comforted me deep inside.

Most of the time now I would feel so damn bored and lonely. I've been thinking about you lately and been browsing through the pictures we took together. If not, I would lie down on the bed hugging our teddy bear daughter Tinky just to keep myself company and warmed up.

The day when we separated, you promised and asked me to wait for. Have you forgotten? Even when we chatted on msn, something that we've talked for about 40 minutes ago can be easily forgotten by you.. Was it because you were busy keeping company with someone new that you just met, or was it because you've completely lost that feelings and interest for me already? I know I don't have the chance to stand out, because you told me last time that, sure you won't stop any of your ex-bfs to try to woo you again, but you definitely won't go back to them.

You've said that I'm much closer than a best friend to you. The way I see it, I've been treated like an ex. We are so far away, and it feels like you are getting further and further away from me. Why is it so hard to reach you? Every single day it has been so hard to talk to you. I've tried so hard just to talk to you and all I get is just a word or two, a few dots and an emoticon..

What has gotten wrong with you? Or was it me? Was the "extra-attention" I got few weeks after we broke up was because you don't want me to be sad?

So hard to reach you already.. I'm not the one that's getting away, you are...

Yours Sincerely.,
Daniel Bryan